Comments on: Ask A Guy - Reader Submission

By: sHaE-sHaE

sHaE-sHaE — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 20:45:57 +0000

As a woman I find a few faults with this story such as “I’m good people” yet she had “great sex” with a married man. Stop playing, it’s 2009. People get divorced as often as they change socks. So you mean to tell me a man in this day & age that isn’t happy with his marriage isn’t going to end it and is having affairs with random chicks (sorry that’s what you are if you are not his wife) and she believes he’ll change? This is the problem in society. IMO he put it on the table straight with no chaser. Here’s what I hear, “Hi I’m married but I want to fool around. You down?” To which she says, “Of course!” So tragic.

By: nospringchicken

nospringchicken — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 14:54:36 +0000

Wow! I had completely forgot about this submission of mine—just found the reply(s) cleaning up my inbox and came back to this site. Interesting. All the comments………….
Was there a point to my letter? I am not sure actually. I was curious to see what kind of response I would get. I have always found all people to be a bit of a puzzle and I find it an interesting quest to “seek to understand”. ” People” does include myself. Some curious points here!
Bragging about a player? Certainly not. What is really going on here ? Am I really confused? Perhaps….. What I do know is this. I recently returned from my visit. As always, it was comfortable, loads of fun, and the sex was still great. But more importantly, the level of friendship has grown deeper. We talked about many things, not just superficial crap. I should say HE talked about many deep, personal life things. Is that love? I don’t think so. At least not “the love” we all talk about here. I think it has more to do with trust and feeling like he had a true friend listening that kept him going on and on. I suspect he doesn’t have that much elsewhere. How does that make me feel? Part of me I suspect would enjoy something more. However, being the mature woman that I am, I know there is no way he would ever be capable of a “true love relationship”. Does that make me feel a bit wistful? Admittedly, yes. Thanks for reading and sharing. Don’t forget….live every day like it is your last, because you never know, it might be.

By: Ask A Guy - Where do players come from? | Truth Merchants

Ask A Guy - Where do players come from? | Truth Merchants — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 16:27:53 +0000

[...] yesterday’s reader submission also delved into the topic [...]

By: Chocolate Chiq

Chocolate Chiq — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 02:13:04 +0000

@SILKIE TRICKZ I thought is was just me!

IMO, and in my experience, if a woman is just in it to have fun she will “gush” about the great sex…and that is it.

When a woman start “gushing” about how great a guy is, and how funny he is, and popular he is (which I am going to assume he is attractive) and add on top of this he is GREAT IN BED?!?! From my past experiences with my girlfriends/relatives, she is starting to fall for him.

So my question: what point is she trying to make in the letter?

Is she trying to brag about making a player fall for her or has she gotten caught up and doesn’t want to admit to it?

But this is just my opinion!

By: loveliesandmusic

loveliesandmusic — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 23:02:25 +0000

ok so i have a few opinions…

1) guys are just as complicated as they make most women seem.

2) she says she would never REALLY be with him but finds herself a little confused as to what to do with him? She’s confusing me. If she didn’t want to be with him on a serious level then why the confusion?

3)the “luvyalotz” thing is EXACTLY what Preston said it was. Please don’t mistake this for any real genuine emotion.

I mean i think this chick is a little confused and maybe she’s telling herself that it’s nothing serious because SHE needs convincing. The dude seems to be up front and honest about his shit. It’s clear that she’s seeking some advice as to what to do next when there shouldn’t be a next. It is what it is. Of course players fall in love too. Whether or not they’re open to the possibility is another story. In this case it seems like dude is cool with things being the way they are and if she’s cool with it too then continue to go with the flow. things will progress naturally if it’s something you both want.

I have to admit that he is giving off the wrong signal asking her to move closer. Or maybe he’s asking her to move closer because he wants to be with her and can’t imagine a real relationship with her otherwise. hmmm.

By: SILKIE TRICKZ

SILKIE TRICKZ — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 21:34:27 +0000

CHOCOLATE CHIQ, YOUR LAST PARAGRAPH TOOK THE WORDS RIGHT OUT OF MY MOUTH. I MEAN WTF IS REALLY GOING ON?! OR YOU’RE JUST ASKING QUESTIONS YOU KNOW THE ANSWERS TO, BUT DON’T WANT TO ADMIT THEM TO YOURSELF.

By: Chocolate Chiq

Chocolate Chiq — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 19:22:52 +0000

As a female, I found the wording of the letter was very strange.

The “I fell for him in a BIG way.” comment is in complete opposition to the “I know we are just having a good time” feel of the rest of the letter. The repeated mentions about the his great humor and how great of a guy he is and the sex is magnificent and he not married…sounds like the type of things a woman in love would say or type of things that could have a woman completely in love with a man even if he does not live in the same area or is/was a player. Something seems off to me…..

If you are a mature woman who is comfortable having a good time with a mature guy who is not going to commit, what is with all the questions? If he is definitely the kind of man that she wouldn’t marry, what is the concern? Can a player fall in love? Of course, but shouldn’t she know that?

By: Preston Swagger

Preston Swagger — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 18:38:28 +0000

@Reina — In this particular case, we’re talking about the guy who WON’T commit. The author of this letter believes that this man will NEVER be a “one-woman man”, so I’m operating under that assumption. That makes this case is a little different.

With your typical guy, not being like the other women who sweat him will get you in the door. After that, you’ll have to hold his attention and get him to fall for you. A feat I have a hunch you’ve pulled off once or twice in your time on this earth.

@Bahama — Don’t give up on us…lol. We’re not TOO bad!

@Reina & Bahama — Keep in mind this also works in reverse. When the guy becomes boring, mundane, or just like every other guy to the woman, she’ll be out the door as well…

By: Bahama

Bahama — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 18:26:10 +0000

I so give up trying to understand the male species

By: Reina

Reina — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 17:36:58 +0000

LOL @ tryst I like it.

So being elusive and not clamoring for his attention will make him want more of mine? Yet when I began desiring his time & attention, I lose it and become one of the pack? How do you balance that?