Ladies - Are you faking?

Happy Friday.  Welcome back to another edition of the Ladie’s Poll.

To our lovely lady readers — I think I can speak for all of the Merchants when I say we don’t think you should be faking the big “O”.  You’re cheating yourself and letting some guy think his lame performance was something other than what it really was.  But we understand that sometimes the situation calls for it.  He’s wack, you’re tired…it’s time to put an end to the nonsense.  So here is today’s question:

How many orgasms have you faked in the last 365?  As always, elaboration is encouraged.  We’ll see you in the comments section.  –Pres

RESULTS OF LAST WEEK’S POLL - Ladies: Would you date outside of your race?

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Ask A Guy - Do Men Fake Orgasms??

Q: Do men fake orgasms?

A: Yup. We sure do…

Thanks for the questions!  Keep ‘em coming!

Oh…you want to know why?  Alright, I’ll break it down for you:

I don’t feel like using clinical terms, so we’re gonna get a little raunchy.  If that’s not your steez, now would be a good time for you to click another link.

Here we go:

After a guy busts a nut, a little recuperation time is needed (sometimes he needs til morning).  But most guys can usually take a break and then get it crackin again.  The gifted few *brushes dirt off shoulder* can keep their stroke going while they are recharging.

But ladies, you knew this…

Here’s what you may not have known: Each nut after the first is a little tougher/trickier to get.  The second bust is fairly common.  It’s also usually the showstopper.  After that second nut, there’s a wonderful relaxing…kinda empty feeling that washes over us (that’s why we usually ask you for a sandwich.  We NEED that shit).  But every now and then, we go for that illustrious third orgasm.  It is the toughest to achieve, but if we feel even an inkling that says we can pull it off, we dive right back into…ummmm…you.

And that’s when it happens:

After a few minutes we realize…it ain’t happenin.  Mr. Happy might be staying up and doing his job, but after each nut the sensitivity of our dick changes and it often times has nothing to do with you.  It just ain’t happening.  Meanwhile, there you are—our girlfriend or just our lady for the evening—riding, keeping the knees up, or backing that thang up.  I mean you are doing your damn duty!  And still…

It ain’t happenin…

So what do we do now?

Just stop?  Pull out and tell you the truth?  In that moment would you even believe us?  Would you not wonder just a little bit if it’s your fault?  I don’t want that insecurity creepin in.  I want you to just keep throwing that thing around with reckless abandon!

So what do we do……We fake an orgasm.

Everyone is happy. We get a sandwich (please). And we both go to sleep. And that’s why we do it.

AND…

That’s also why women shouldn’t do it!!  You see, we fake it very rarely and it’s only because you were feeling so lovely that we thought we could go overboard in search of that 3rd or 4th nut.  We do it because your shit was good!  Women do it cause shit AIN’T good!!

Women, you deserve to get pleased!  You deserve your nut as much as we do.  And if you ain’t gettin it, don’t fake it! 

Show that fool!

Teach that fool!

If need be…grab one of your toys or use your hands…to HELP that fool.

But don’t fake it…Because then you’re only cheating yourself.  And there’s no need to…

I’ll be a fool for you…

–Preston

Gotta question you’d like answered…ASK THE FELLAS

Note: Check out the NEW “Dear You” site.  You’ll thank me…

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